From complex.com's compilation of most bizarre Craig's List ads

I posted my favs below. See full list here


PIZZA + JO - 42

42 dwm wants a man to come over and split a deep dish pep. and extra cheese. Its large and very greasy. Come over and rub a slice on abs and chest. Let me see your ripped arms and legs covered in sauce and cheese put your legs up on the couch ! Let me help you rub pizza in your pits after a hard day. You want pizzapits?? Im your man Reply with your fav toppings and i will see what we can do.


i want to pay ONE DOLLAR to have sex with a hot bitch - m4w - 22

why? simply to make you feel like the dirty whore that you are (you clicked on the post right?). the terms are not negotiable, no more or less than a dollar. i have pics. all applicants must send pics as well.

if you end up being ugly, i will still have sex with you, but i will pay in pennies.


Amputee? - m4m - 52

I’m not an amp, but I am interested in you as a whole person and as an amputee. I’m GWM, 52, HWP, and I’d welcome your reply.


Fart Bud Wanted - 24

Bi dude looking for a masc. guy who has rank farts. If you can clear a room then hit me up. I wanna inhale every bit of your raunch man stink. I am open to more if we vibe but I really wanna taste your eggs.

Clean, normal, D/D free, you be too. Send stats and a little be about yourself. Would be cool if this could be a regular thing.


CAR HEAD FOR OLDER SENIORS

LOOKING FOR SENIOR MEN OVER 60, (OLDER THE BETTER) WHO WANT TO RECEIVE A NSA BLOWJOB IN THEIR CAR. LET ME PROVIDE FOR YOU WHAT YOUR WIFE WONT ANY LONGER. WE MEET, I GET IN, I SUCK YOU OFF, THEN LEAVE. IM CLEAN, MARRIED, HEALTHY, AND DISCREET, YOU NEED BE TOO. RESPOND WITH YOUR STATS PLEASE.


I’m big and ugly but want to get l aid today! - w4m - 34

I want a no strings attached f buddy that is responsible and eye candy to finger my slit. I will deep throat your dick the way you wish So let’s hump! Oh I have green eyes, auburn hair, 5′8, 36D boob size, 117 lbs. Please be DD free. Respond with headshot.