Sunday, August 2, 2009


Bet both those drinks are for him. This is a long one but worth the read. The first paragraph is a more of a what-the-hell is this guy on feeling. The second describes every date he has ever been on. Doesn't he just make you want to respond to his ad? Or throw a drink in his face?

From Metairie, LA

I always knew I was never going to be a professional bull fighter, but that's not why I did it. I'd like to be cowboys from Arizona or pimps from Oakland but it's not Halloween. Grow up; Peter Pan, Count Chocula.

I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.

1 comment:

  1. What makes it even worse is that the entire second paragraph was copy and pasted from IMDB's "Memorable Quotes" page for the movie Wedding Crashers.